I can't believe the nerve of my EX and your sperm donor, Cylas. I'm finally ready to try and start dating again and he finds a way to make me feel so angry and mad all over again. I have a Facebook account, and he recently set one up for himself, too. Well I guess yesterday he found mine and seen where I was talking about J and how much I like him and everything. So he texts me and says "what's up?" And I'm like what to do you mean? And he said oh I just seen your FB account. I told him that I loved FB! I thought that would be the end of the conversation, but I was wrong.
Then he said I see you have a new beau and I said no not yet, but I'm working on it. And he said oh, well I have to admit I was a little jealous, but I am happy for you. I'm like WHAT!!! I was livid. After everything that has happened in the last three years he has no right to be jealous over anything or anyone. He lost that right when he walked away from our marriage and decided to end it. He denied you and said you were not his son. I was upset and mad the rest of the evening. I even had a conversation with J but couldn't enjoy it because I kept thinking about the EX!!! He's so ridiculous. He has a new wife, he made his choice and I guess now he has to live with it.
And that's not even the topper to this whole drama. He's been asking me if he can come see the house. He said that Prairie "told" him she wanted him to see her new room. I've come thisclose to agreeing on that happening, you know to keep her happy, but then I find out she hasn't even said anything about him coming to see her room at all. He's using her to get to me and I almost let it happen. I should have known better. I feel like an idiot right now.
Go figure, as soon as I'm ready to open up to someone new, and a GOOD someone, my EX decides to add his two cents. J makes me smile, I just think about him and I smile. That's something that hasn't happened in a long time. We've had our first conversation on the phone and talked about everything. I told him about you, and of course he already knows about Prairie and Boss, but I know he was just making sure I didn't have like ten more kids hiding somewhere, HA! He likes Vampires, which I think is AWESOME! He works, and no one has to make him work, I had to threaten the EX in order to get him to keep a job! J is just better. And I've been praying so hard about this. I don't want my heart to lead the way, which is what happened the last time, I want God to have a hand in this. If J and I are meant to be then I guess we'll know soon enough. I am pretty sure you can see a little difference in me. And you are more than welcome to nudge J's thoughts my way, if you want to!
My EX is realizing what he's missing. He sees all the blessings I've received. I'm blessed to have three wonderful children and soon I'll be blessed with my very own house. I recently got a different vehicle, not new but it's new to me. I truly feel blessed. I don't what else to say. Things are moving along with J and I feel like I'm finally in a happy place. I don't need anyone trying to ruin that. I can honestly say that I am really jazzed about J and can't wait to hear from him. I hope I get to see him tonight. I've been trying to get him to the movies, but he's always working. He's such a hard worker!! So different from the EX!
You are my Sunshine
6 years ago